You don’t forget some things.
You think you do, till
You find them lurking in a corner of your heart,
Waiting for a time to attack.
Stunned by how much they’ve become you,
You recollect what they are,
In a bid to distinguish,
Your you from their you.
You start with a familiar one.
A feeling you’ve developed
A symbiotic relation with,
Who cares if your connection
With shame is
Mutualistic or parasitic?
You remember the shame you felt,
When you were told
‘It’s wrong to question or have doubts’
Now the world knows how
Less of a believer you truly are.
Or how you felt,
When your mother told you,
‘Stop being gluttonous. No man wants a woman
who eats the way you do’.
Ashamed that you might never
Get a man and thus, hurt your mother.
Ashamed that you have to
Reduce your love for food, not
Because it’s detrimental to your health,
Because your man won’t like it.
The shame you felt,
When, with your ‘friends’,
You try not to appear
Or say words of prayer,
Lest you come off as overly dependent
You cannot forget some things.
Futile attempts at uncoupling, shows
Your shame is part of you.
Hasn’t it been said that,
‘When a leaf wraps a bar of soap for long,
It becomes soap too’?
At the beginning of this year, I made a decision to write more and also share my works more, so help me God. If you know I write, you also know how lily-livered I am when it comes to sharing things I’ve written. But then, what’s the worse that could happen?
I decided to start by sharing some of the things I wrote last year. Those I think are worth sharing, that is.
I wrote this particular piece for a prompt during Ramadan.
If you read this till the end, thank you. Why not leave a comment and let me know what you think about the poem?
Till we meet again, bi idhniLlah.