Rants

On Men who Harass Muslim Women

Few days ago, I read an article written by Aaisha Muhammad on a similar topic and I decided to make this blog post. Enjoy!

The discomfort caused to Muslim women by some men isn’t a strange topic. Almost all Muslim women have been harassed in one way or another . And no,this isn’t about rape alone,that’s a weightier topic that should be treated separately; it’s about those “little” things you do which make us uncomfortable.

I remember when I was still working; I was in the shop one day with my friend when a man came and asked for our boss. Since our boss wasn’t around, I stood up to take his orders; suddenly, he took the biscuit I was eating and ate it. In my mind, I was like “Is this man okay?” but I decided to ignore him. When he was about to leave, he called me outside and asked for my number; I declined and went inside. Then this psychopath of a man followed me and started touching me with the lame excuse that he was looking for money; because,according to him,since i couldn’t give him my number, I have to give him money. This man couldn’t have been anything below 50 years, I was amazed at his perversion. But what did I do? I found a way to wiggle myself out of his hold. After he left I found myself questioning the way I was dressed saying, “It’s probably because I’m wearing a tight jeans, knee-length top and a cape hijab. It’s somehow revealing, you know”.

And this is what we all do, myself included; we overlook these things by making excuses for the perpetrator, saying things like ” He meant no harm; he was just joking; I don’t want to offend him” while blaming ourselves for their misconducts. For example, I was blaming what happened on the way I was dressed. However, when I got to school, I realised the way you dress doesn’t stop you from being harassed and dressing shouldn’t be used as a basis for consent. I’ve encountered many guys who would want me to shake or hug them with the full hijab. There’s a particular lecturer who would always tell me ” Alhaja come and hug me”.Sometimes, this issue of harassment isn’t limited to Muslim ladies alone. A coursemate once told me how she hugged a lecturer and he was trying to rub her back. And what do we all do? We keep quiet and act like nothing is wrong.

While there are some guys who are truly ignorant of the Islamic ruling of not touching your non mahrams, most of them are aware but they choose to be jerks. Most times, they want to know if you’ll give in to their requests and sadly, some of us do.

However, there are some guys who are simply angels; they respect you and your beliefs. This is to show that there are good men out there. To the good ones amongst you, keep being good.

From friends with “pure” intentions who bug you to hug or shake them,to lecturers who see no harm in rubbing your backs after being coerced to hug them, to uncles who are “family” who think they can touch you anywhere, to classmates who think it’s amusing to call you ” sexy alhaja,eleha toh jasi,alhaja toh shaprapra” and even strangers who think it’s fun to poke you with their organs in a bus; almost every lady has been harassed by a guy or another. The days of making excuses for anyone who harasses us are over. We must learn to speak up and protect ourselves. Any guy who makes us uncomfortable shouldn’t have the privilege of being comfortable.

❤, Simbiat.

……….

Thanks for reading!!

Please don’t forget to like, comment and share.

7 thoughts on “On Men who Harass Muslim Women”

  1. This us a nice read, I must say.
    Every lady out there must be able to stand up for themselves and face any issue of molestation head-on. At times, some are being take advantage on because those who do that feels they are like the normal ‘I don’t care where he touches me lady’ out there. Not know their her chaste women that shouldn’t be taken advantage of.
    Thanks for putting this up. It’s laudable.

    Like

  2. “This is a nice read, I must say.
    Every lady out there must be able to stand up for herself and face any issue of molestation head-on. At times, some are being taken advantage of because those who do it feel they are like the normal ‘I don’t care where he touches me’ ladies out there. Not knowing they are chaste women that shouldn’t be taken advantage of.

    Thanks for putting this up. It’s laudable.”

    Like

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